


Troubled Mind, Troubled Heart

by feathertail



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ben Solo Doesn't Turn to the Dark Side, Angst, Character Death, Dark Side Rey, M/M, The Dark Side of the Force
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-27
Updated: 2018-04-27
Packaged: 2019-04-28 13:53:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14450643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feathertail/pseuds/feathertail
Summary: In which Rey is a Solo and Ben never had Snoke whispering in his ear.





	Troubled Mind, Troubled Heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FeralCreed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeralCreed/gifts).



 

She grew up loved beyond compare, used to the devotion of her brother and parents, along with Poe (who was all but her brother at this point, especially now he and Ben had finally admitted their feelings for one another). Perhaps this was why, when Ben grew old enough and started to perform more duties for the Resistance, as she grew into a teenager, things became more difficult. The war was going badly, from what she understood – her father was rarely at home, smuggling supplies to and from bases throughout the galaxy; her mother was always in meetings planning their next moves, and countermoves; Poe had achieved the rank of Commander, and flew his own squadron, and spent most of his time there. As for Ben- he had completed his Jedi training under Luke, and was used in diplomacy missions just as much as his Uncle, if not more, because Luke was dedicating his time to training more Jedi to try to alleviate the pressure on the two of them.

 

It was on one of the rare occasions that Ben was home for a substantial stretch of time that he was disturbed while catching up with Poe after being away for so long. The automated voice of a familiar protocol droid broke easily through their quiet murmurings in a secluded corner of the hangar.

“Master Ben- Master Ben!”

Ben groaned, pulling away from where he and Poe had had their heads bowed together, foreheads leaning together as they spoke quietly and sometimes exchanged small kisses. “What, Threepio?”

“Oh, pardon me, sir. It’s just- your sister has not emerged from her bedroom for at least three days. I believe the reason may be something to do with your absence.”

Ben sighed under his breath and waved the droid away, standing up slowly. “Come with me?” he asked Poe softly, smiling when he received a nod in return.

 

* * *

 

 

He didn’t receive an answer when he knocked on her door, but pushed it open slowly. “Rey?” There was a quick scramble of movement on the bed as he spoke, his sister hiding something under a blanket on the bed. Something… metal? Were those-

“Lightsabre parts?” he queried, padding into the room without being invited, leaving Poe to lean on the doorjamb. “Are you building a lightsabre?”

“No,” Rey replied quickly, perhaps a little too quickly, and harshly. “It’s a hydraulics output for the Falcon. Papa asked me to make one for when he came back, his is faulty.”

Ben raised an eyebrow, unimpressed by her story. “Okay, so, they’re not lightsabre parts.” He sat down on the bed next to her, and she moved cautiously to sit on the lump covered by the blanket, a little wary of him trying to reveal what was under there.

“Threepio tells me you haven’t been out of your room in a while,” he tried, stopping when he was met with a stubborn glare. She was a perfect mix of Han and Leia in that aspect – she could out-stubborn most people. “Are you okay?”

His question was met with a sullen silence and the continuation of her glare. Well, that pretty much answered that question. “What’s wrong?” he murmured, moving closer to wrap an arm around her. She flinched away and slapped at his arm.

“Don’t touch me,” she hissed, glare turning thunderous. Ben held up his hands, backing off.

“Hey, I’m backed off, I’m backed off.”

“Good. And stay there,” she returned, glowering, folding her arms across her chest.

“Rey-” Ben tried again. “C’mon, it’s not like I would leave you, we’re family. I’m stuck with you-” Rey cut him off, clenching her fists tightly. Everything in the room began to shake, the mirror cracking at the edges.

“Well, I’m _sorry_. I didn’t _ask_ for you to be stuck with me,” she spat.

“Rey, no, I didn’t mean it like that, you know I didn’t.” He tried to pull her into his arms, but was not prepared for what came next. There was an immense push to his chest, and he flew backwards, his back slamming into the opposite wall as the lightbulbs overhead exploded. Poe rushed to his side, cradling his face.

“Ben? Ben!”

“’m fine,” Ben mumbled, blinking woozily. Poe’s face swam into focus, and behind him, Rey, staring at what she had done with a petrified look on her face. “Rey-”

“I- I need to go,” she mumbled, scrambling to her feet, bolting for the floor, with a crunch of broken glass and the clatter of something else falling to the floor. Ben made to follow her, but Poe pushed him back with a gentle hand on his chest.

“You’re in no shape to be going anywhere,” he murmured softly, cradling the back of Ben’s head where it had hit the wall, grimacing when it came away wet and sticky. He gently pressed a thumb to his partner’s lip as well, trying too late to stop blood from dripping onto his shirt.

“I need to go after her,” Ben insisted, but Poe shook his head.

“You need to leave her to calm down, otherwise both of you are going to get hurt even more.” He was about to continue, but paused at the look on his partner’s face. “What? What is it?” He turned to look where Ben’s eyes were rigidly fixed. He frowned, moving to pick up whatever it was that was glowing so brightly. Turning it over in his hands, he shook his head in confusion, looking up at Ben. “What is it?”

Ben swallowed thickly, holding out his hands to take the object from Poe. “It’s… it’s her kyber crystal. What generates the power of the lightsabre.”

“But it’s glowing… they’re not supposed to glow that colour, are they?”

“Not unless there’s something very, very wrong.”

And there was. There had been something wrong for years, a voice whispering in the ear of a young girl whose biggest influence, her biggest idol, was absent, replacing the most significant voice of advice in her life. And as Ben pulled Poe into his arms to hide his tears, he clutched the crystal tightly, hoping there was something he could do to undo its bloody red glow.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a fic I've had buzzing around in my head for a while, and I'm starting to get it down - please let me know what you think!


End file.
